“And what about this one?” Teacher Lynn holds up a picture to the group of preschoolers. “Are we allowed to feel like this?” I move a little closer to get a clearer view of the photo depicting a little girl, tears streaming down her face.
“Oh No!” “Never.” “Sometimes.” “Maybe?!” Self-confident answers become more reluctant as the preschoolers wait for encouragement. A bright-eyed five-year-old eagerly nods his head up and down in response. Teacher Lynn smiles before she reassures them: “Of course we are allowed to feel sad. I also feel sad sometimes – especially over the weekends when I miss you an awful lot and Monday feels so far away”. Her eyes start to twinkle with excitement: “But what do I do with that feeling?”. She graciously moves to the other side of the room, spins around and starts to boogie. “I sing a little song and do a little dance until I feel better”. In Marc Brackett’s book “Permission to feel”, he writes in the prologue how ‘we deny ourselves – and one another – the permission to feel’ (Brackett, 2019:3). This leads to our losing our ability to even identify what we’re feeling. Therefore, we might become unable to understand why we’re experiencing an emotion or what’s happening in our lives that’s causing it. And when we can’t recognize, understand, or put into words how we feel, Brackett says it’s impossible for us to do anything about it. He suggests that to master out feelings we should rather accept them, even embrace them and learn to make our emotions work for us, not against us. Teacher Lynn applied Brackett’s suggestions with ease. She acknowledged the importance of being allowed to feel sad and therefore she was able to empower the preschoolers by giving them tools to react upon their sadness. Until they felt better. The healing often depends on the process.
9 Comments
Jeanette
9/15/2021 11:42:52 pm
I do agree with with blog, but at the same time I feel like dancing and singing a song to feel better is in some way a way of preventing yourself from feeling sad. Sometimes we should just accepted fully.
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Eliana
9/15/2021 11:49:23 pm
When you have the courage to recognize and acknowledge your feelings and express it and embrace it, you can move through the steps to deal with it, to have a better mindset and to cope with life. When you start with small steps, you can reach a big outcome and make even more progress. It will help you to understand yourself and what works best to live a expressive life.
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Janca
9/15/2021 11:50:21 pm
I think it's important to acknowledge one's and other's feelings... People need to know that they are fully accepted with the feelings they have. Feelings show integrity. Without feelings there wouldn't be moral values, so feelings are important!
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Margriet Aucamp
9/22/2021 04:34:24 pm
Society often makes us feel like we have to hide our emotions. Showing negative feelings such as sadness is often seen as weakness. Sharing and expressing our feelings, however, is imperative in gaining perspective and learning how to deal with them. We can believe that we will get better, but that doesn't mean that we can't acknowledge that we don't necessarily feel that way.
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Elandri Vorster
4/4/2022 02:53:08 am
I agree that we are allowed to feel. It is hard to allow yourself to feel when the emotion is negative and even overwhelming, but we need to allow ourselfs to deal with what we are feeling. I always pray until I feel better, but sometimes it takes a while.
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Julian Reinecke-Watson
4/4/2022 02:53:13 am
I agree. We should embrace feeling, even the worst feelings out there. How can we be human if we don't digest emotions? Emotions make us who we are. We should take advantage of the fact that we can feel.
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Wilhelm Meyer
4/4/2022 02:55:12 am
In Psychology alot of Neurotic behaviour is because we repress, fixate or misplace the feelings we experience ... Also alot of our behaviour can be treated towards optimal development if we treat our emotions ... Therefore I am a believer of embracing each and every emotion regardless of what society and culture prescribes me to do ... I am a man, I will cry if I need to ... Until I feel better
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Dehan
4/4/2022 02:56:04 am
I think that this was very beautiful…how the teacher reassures the children that it is okay to feel sadness sometimes and that even grown ups can start to feel sad from time to time. I feel that the most important thing to do when feeling sad is to talk to someone that genuinely cares for you and who will listen with sencerity.
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Bernice Klopper
4/4/2022 03:02:50 am
I wholeheartedly agree with this article. You need to allow yourself to experience negative feelings such as sadness, so that you can understand this feelings and healing can take place. Be gracious with yourself, give yourself some time, embrace all feelings and work through it on your own time.
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